Someone please tell me this is a dream and she's still tiny and snuggly and makes squeaky noises and sleep in her cradle.... Or that she still gazes at my face for long minutes in adoration while I coax a smile out of her and blinks in that slow, sweet newborn way. Tell me that each day isn't falling away as quickly as the tide washes away the sand...
You can't? I knew it. It's been such a wonderful year and I just love watching my sweet girl grow and change and become the little amazing person God created her to be.
But can't time slow down...just a little? I am filled with torn emotions: In one hand, I want to tightly hold on to her innocence, her sweetness, her babyness, her soft chubbiness and sweet smells.
And in the other hand, I can't wait to watch her become. I can't wait to hear her talk and watch her walk around and learn about her world even more. I can't wait to see how she plays with her brothers and wraps her daddy even tighter around her little fingers...if that's even possible. I can't wait to learn how to be a mother to a daughter and see how that will differ from mothering my boys.
I wish I could have both.
I see how fast time slips away as I look at my tall, independent 6 year old and my growing, spirited 4 1/2 (can't forget the 1/2 when he's around!) year old and wonder "Wasn't I just holding them? Wasn't I just taking pictures of their every waking moments, hoping to capture each sweet moment in timeless memory? Where did my baby go?"
I am storing up and treasuring each moment, good and bad, thrilling and exhausting, joyous and frustrating and tucking them close in my heart.