Dreams and Kids Say the Darndest Things!

We like to tease the boys and say that we "feel" their food in their tummies (Oh, there's a piece of chicken! Oh, that's a pea right there, etc ) just to be silly. (because you become more silly with each passing year of parenthood!) So today the boys and I were eating lunch and I ate something and Samuel was watching me and said, "Where did it go, mommy?" So I started tracing the path of my bite of cornbread down towards my stomach, talking about it's every move. The boys were watching me really intently with their mouths hanging open like something great was about to happen and then I gasped and said, "It's right here!" while pointing to a spot on my stomach. They giggled and as I turned from the table Samuel said, "Is it in your weg (leg) now?"

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Zakkai's new word (isn't there always one?!) is "Nope!" Zakkai, do you want some more water? "Nope!" Zakkai, can you share this toy with Samuel? "Nope!" He's very emphatic, too:) He LOVES Samuel so much. Tonight the boys were in bed and Samuel had to make a trip to the bathroom. Zakkai kept calling, "Samel! Samel! Where Samel go?" And Samuel said to me, "Mommy, why is he calling my name?"

I said, "Because he loves you SO much!"

Samuel said, "Why does he love me?"

and I replied with the exact truth, "Because you're his best friend and his brother." And I hope it stays that way!

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Tonight in our housegroup, we spoke about dreams. Dreams and plans that you have as a married couple and of your own, too. I realized that I had so many dreams (I am a dreamer and not really a long term planner!) when I was younger but I have put so many of them on hold as Ben and I go through this journey of education and focusing on his schooling and career right now. It's not a bad thing! As a matter of fact, I wholeheartedly support him and pray for him and am in this with him every step of the way. It just doesn't allow for many of my dreams to be realized just yet. I put them on pause; except for my dream of being married and having children, of course, but guess what? Now that I am FREE (see last post) and Ben is getting ever closer to being done....I think it's time to revisit those dreams and figure out all of the possibilities!

Thinking

I am thinking these days. Thinking about who I am, my relationship with God, who I want to be, etc. That's some deep stuff! This past weekend at the conference, one of the speakers was talking about our gifts that God has given us. She had 3 categories of people and what they do with their gifts. I fell under the category of : Person who spends so much time longing for and envying other people's gifts that I neglect to use my own as effectively as I could.

I did a lot of praying this weekend and received prayer and realized something (and not for the first time!): The words my father spoke over me as a child (you're not good enough/you do not measure up to anyone else/you are not worthy of my love, etc) have held such strong power over me all of these years (hey, it's been a long almost 28 years!) and have manefested themselves in me, producing such insecurity, self-hatred and such a deep longing to be loved just for who I am.

I spend SO much time wishing I had things that other people have. Not physical things (although I do occasionally lust for a dishwasher or a house) but gifts, qualities, character traits. I wish I was neverendingly patient like THAT mom, I wish I always responded so gently like THAT wife, I wish I was an incredibly gifted writer like THAT author or blogger, I wish I could play the piano like THAT person.....you get the point. I am now so incredibly aware of how often I do this! But this weekend for the first time, I feel that the power of my earthly father's words was broken and is being replaced with the gentle, new-every-morning compassionate, and ever so faithful love and words of my Heavenly Father.

I hope that I can learn to like and yes, even love the woman that God created in me. I pray I can be tuned in the unique gifts and characteristics He wove into me when He formed me in the womb. And I pray that I can, with His help, break down all of the barriers that stop me from effectively using them for the kingdom of God. I AM FREE!!!!

Monday, Monday!

After taking approximately 42 pictures, I finally got a good one of my Samuel!

Playing with crepes is MUCH more interesting than taking pictures...

This little Monkey was a hoot trying to make/wrap up his own crepes!

I can hear him smiling and laughing as I look at this. He's such a happy boy!

The Thomas wall!

It was SUCH busy weekend for me! Saturday I was gone all day and spent less than 1 1/2 hours in my family's presence! It was crazy and very refreshing (but I still missed them!) I went to a women's retreat and then came back home, helped finished getting the boys dinner and in bed and left again to have milkshakes with a friend! Fun, fun!

Aside from congestion (you know the kind that hangs on for-EVER after a cold and about drives you insane?), we are all doing well. The boys are busy and cute, as usual:) Last night, I went in to tuck the boys in bed after reading time (a fairly new establishment that works wonders!) and Samuel had a big bulge in the front of his pjs. I unzipped him and 5 stuffed animals came tumbling out! He chuckled and said, "Aww! Those were my sweet babies I was going to have!"

I should not even post this glorious thought aloud but our bedtime problems are solved! The boys were being such stinkers and keeping each other awake until the break of dawn...ok, 9pm or so but STILL! And Samuel was sneaking out of bed, etc. So with the help of some great advice from a friend and research on the internet...the boys now get around 20 min of extra reading time in their beds (after we do our whole bedtime routine) with just the closet light on and some soft classical music playing. Then we come in, tuck them in (again), turn out the light, take the books and leave the music on. They talk for a little while but settle down SOOOOO much quicker and all is usually quiet shortly after we leave. Oh and I removed all toys from the room except the train table which I cover with an extra fitted sheet. They are much happier now that they are getting good sleep. And I am much happier, too:)

Samuel also now has a Thomas Wall as you can see in the pic above! He gets a Thomas sticker for the wall (courtesy of Target!!!) when he's a good listener and stays in bed and goes to sleep quietly. He's got quite a collection now! I alternate now, either giving him a sticker or letting him get out of bed and play at his train table while I take my shower and while Zakkai is still cooped up in his crib. He feels mighty special!

Anyhoo, we're doing well, busy and preparing to travel home for Easter! Can't wait to see the fam!

Germs and Boys, Boys and Germs

Well, the glorious passing of germs is continuing here in the Thomas household. I peeked in on the boys last night before going to bed and found Samuel really flushed and not looking quite "right." He woke up and acted really strange and he was SO hot. He told me his tummy hurt (mine did too at the beginning of this nastiness) and asked me to pray for him to feel better. And after being drugged and settled with some water....he slept the whole night through. Today his voice is hoarse which freaked him out! He started crying and said, "Mommy! I don't wike this voice!" Not much I can do but at least we have matching voices now:)
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The other day after nap, I was organizing things in our bedroom and Z was sitting on our bed looking through photo albums. He opened one that has random pics of Samuel as a baby and he exclaimed, "Baby Jesthusth!" I told him gently that no, it wasn't baby Jesus, it was Samuel. He emphatically told me again that it was Baby "Jesthusth" but I was able to reassure him that it was indeed, his brother. So he turned the page and said, "Wook! It's anovver baby Samel!"
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Today is my Grandpa's birthday! I think he would say it's the second anniversary of his 39 1/2 birthday! See if you can figure that one out! My Grandpa is a big teddy bear who adores his family and loves to help others! He is "semi-retired" from being a pastor/counselor which means that he is not really retired but gets to go to Florida for the winter...and work there:) He is my only Grandpa and gives the best hugs in the world!
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Samuel just went to sleep with 8 stuffed animals (2 Giraffees, 2 dogs, 3 giraffes and a giraffe blanket)! He goes through phases of insisting on sleeping with certain stuffed animals and blankets beyond Giraffees. It's really quite ridiculous how attached my boys are to their giraffees and rays! They immediately get almost slap happy when they see them, start laughing and stick their fingers in their mouths. Suddenly the world is at right as rain! Hopefully they won't be caught in college with them under their pillows...
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Here is a recipe of some chicken we had this week that is SO easy and yummy!
Alissa's Ritzy Chicken
4 skinless, boneless chicken breasts (mine are usually frozen)
1 can cream of chicken soup, undiluted
1 strip Ritz crackers, crushed
1 TB butter, melted

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees
2. Place chicken breasts in a 9x13 in pan. Cover chicken with soup. Sprinkle crushed crackers over chicken. Drizzle melted butter over top.
3. Bake in oven for 45 min or until chicken is no longer pink!

The Common Cold

I am/have:
Sniffly, snuffly, achy, runny/stuffy nose, can't sleep, sore throat, cannot breathe, dizzy, headache, tired, coughing, ears hurting..........gosh, it sounds like a commercial for NyQuil! Maybe I should go get some...

And now I hear Zakkai coughing. Sigh.