Sticks!

 Strange title, huh? Well, just this morning we started a brand-new system with our kiddos! And....you probably guess it, it has to do with sticks!

I went to MOPS this past week and heard a great speaker (www.NadiaSwearingen-Friesen.com) and she inspired pretty much all of us I am sure:) Not only did she have a great sense of humor (a must when you are a mother!) but she had a really great system she came up with years ago to get her kids organized and NOT relying on parents to tell them every little thing to do.

Once I heard her system, I just knew it would be a great thing for us, tailored to our own family, of course. We have done many charts over the years and lots of them have worked really well but all too often, the chart just becomes another thing blending in to the surroundings on the wall and we slowly forget about it. The boys have a beautiful Clean Room Chart on their wall...but they forgot it was even there! And I am not the best at reinforcing it, especially on 3 nights a week I am flying solo. I'm just too darn tired to think about enforcing the chart and doling out consequences. Bad maybe but it's the truth!

So yesterday, Ben and I sat down and made our list of things the kiddos need to accomplish each day and wrote them all on popsicle sticks! The boys have big sticks for the morning and smaller sticks for the afternoon/evening time. They lay them all out in the order they need to accomplish things and as they finish each thing, they pop the stick into their cup and at the end of the day? If they finish all of their sticks, they get a colored stick (Yellow for Z, Blue for S and Red for E). After they collect 10 colored sticks, they get a prize!

Since Eliana can't read yet, we did pictures on her sticks. She has "Get Dressed," "Brush Teeth," "Quiet/Rest Time," "Clean up Dishes," "Read a Book," and "Clean Up." We will add more as she gets older but this is good for now! She was very happy to put her "Get Dressed" stick in her cup this morning;)

Zakkai very carefully arranged his last night in the order things need to get accomplished and I heard the first stick being plopped in the cup before I was even out of bed this morning! We told them that if they finish their morning tasks early enough, they may be able to do a couple of their optional afternoon ones. There are a few things that can be done in either the morning or afternoon.

One stick that I am very excited about that we are incorporating is the "Spend 15 min with your sibling" stick. So, for example, Zakkai finished all of his morning chores super early this morning (yea!)  and had extra time. He decided to spend 15 minutes with Eliana. We told them they are to go to the sibling they chose (they have their names on each side of the stick) for the day and say, "Would you like to play with me for 15 minutes?" and then "What would you like to play?" The point is to teach them to think about someone else and to hopefully, foster a closer relationship between all of them. They are going to have to stick with each other for a lifetime and learn to work together and love each other through all sorts of experiences. We'd like to start that early!

Zakkai went to Eliana and asked her if she'd like to play. At first she said "No" (little stinker!) but then she quickly changed her mind and told Zakkai she would like to play with her dollhouse. They went up and spent about 10 minutes doing that and 10 more minutes working on her lacing boards. What a great start to the morning!

When I peeked in the boys room before heading downstairs, I found beds made and jammies put away. I think I'm going to really like this!! The boys are very excited about it and we are determined not to just make it "One more system" but something that will become part of our routine. Our goal is to get all of them to be doing the things they need to do without constant reminders or nagging. WE don't get people reminding us to brush our teeth and get our shoes on and clean up our dishes so sooner or later, they need to figure out how to do it without reminders, too!

I love how proud they are already about how much they accomplished by 8am this morning. This will be especially good for Zakkai, who is easily distracted. To have a tangible way to do his tasks and see what he has already done and needs to do is going to be so helpful!

Now the flip side is, this will require just one more chart to be able to administer consequences. I will post a picture of the chart when I finish it. The chart will have each of their names and 3 pictures of ears and 3 pictures of mouths by each name. Why ears and mouths? Because most of the time when they get in trouble, it's for not listening or for talking back! When they do either, they will have to take the corresponding card down and that will earn them an extra chore. Boo!

If they have to take 3 down in one day, they will lose one of their colored sticks. I have a sneaking, really smart Mama suspicion that that won't happen too many times once they get into the system. Who wants to lose a colored stick that they worked so hard for?!

It was so nice this morning not to be reminding every 3 minutes that I almost forgot to do my own things! The boys were packing up to leave and they said, "Mommy? Did you pack our lunches today?" Oops! Maybe I should have made that a stick.....;)

Eliana has a cold and is a little bit on the grumpy side. We finished her lacing boards, got dressed and painted her nails! We haven't done that in so long and she keeps saying, "It's so pretty, Mama!" She came to me while I was writing this and said, "Mommy, you need to put on some Paul." I was really confused for a minute until she pointed to her nails and I realized she was trying to say "Nail Polish." Gosh, she's cute:)

Hopefully, the rest of the day will go just as smoothly! Maybe I'll have extra time in my days now to sit on the couch and eat my chocolates and be fanned with palm leaves. Just kidding! I wish...

SisterChicks

 We are trying to be a little more intentional about filling our family time on the weekends with special moments; not just hanging around doing nothing. Although that is fun sometimes, too! Today we took a trip to Hobby Lobby and picked out a few little accessories for Eliana's dollhouse and a couple small paint by numbers for the boys for a few dollars. They have been working on them all afternoon!

Ben and I were sitting on the couch reading and having a moment of laziness (see, I said it was good sometimes!) and we were listening to the boys talk and giggle over their time playing Mario Kart. They were describing all their races in detail and just having the most fun being downright silly.

All of the sudden, I couldn't stand it anymore. I thought to myself, "What a perfect moment to capture between my sweet boys. Friends. Buddies." And so I did!

I love these two! In the kitchen a little bit ago Zakkai said to Ben, "It's weird how I look like both of you." Ben said, "How do you think you look like both of us?" Zakkai said, "Well, my face and my neck look like mommy," and then he waved his arm from his mid-chest down and said, "And from here down, I look like you!" haha!

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As you may know, we are huge readers in our family, a gift Ben and I are thrilled to pass on to our kids. My sister and I were talking the other day about how we were so thankful that the love for reading was passed onto all of us growing up. All 5 of us love to read!

A series that I just love that captures my heart for a few reasons are the "Sisterchicks" books by Robin Jones Gunn. From the first one I read, I was enthralled and recently I requested all of them from the library. They just came in yesterday and I am finished with two already! (I may not have mentioned that we all also have the gift of reading ridiculously fast!)

There are three things I love about these books. (Be prepared for a little heart-share here or quit reading if you'd like to avoid vulnerability. My specialty!)

One, the women in these books have a friendship that I crave and long for. Her definition of a Sisterchick: "A friend who laughs with you till you cry and cries with you till you laugh; a gift from God." I have noticed especially lately that I really stink at friendship. I used to be so much better about giving of myself and pouring into friendship but over these last barren years of survival, I kind of folded up inside myself and became comfortably uncomfortable in my isolation and insecure in what I have to offer in a friendship. I find myself very unsure of what people think of me and assume that once they get to know me, they will see what a mess I can be and not want to waste their time. To have a friend that would love me for who I am and encourage me to grow and become a better person and who would open up enough for me to love with the same depth would be an honor. An incredible gift.

Two, they are always traveling to a different country in each book and I would give anything to be able to spend time in these countries! But most of all, to have the experiences they have traveling with a Sisterchick friend.

And three, the women in the book always have some eye-opening experience or quiet moment where God breathes new life into their hearts, that are, for different reasons, closed from pain or hurt or the neglect of time. The quiet beauty in which God speaks to them and renews their sense of belonging, purpose and feelings of being loved and cherished is something my heart cries out for. If I was able to fully cast off the lies of my earthly father who hammered into me that I was not good enough and truly accepted the love of my heavenly Father, it would probably help a lot with the whole insecurity/ friendship thing. Healing comes in stages and with every stage, the healing goes a little deeper. I wonder if I will be experiencing that for the rest of my life...

I will leave you with a recap of something one of the characters said to her friend in my most recent read. She said, "You were not meant to carry loss/grief/sadness as if it were your own heavy burden to bear. Give the burden back to God and keep giving it back until you have no more grief in your heart to hand over to Him. Then wait and see what gift He places in your empty hands."

Yes. That is what I want. A Sisterchick friend. To travel. But most of all to be able to fully give my sadness and pain and even my insecurity to the Lord and have Him fill my empty hands with Him and to be fully surrounded with and loved by Him.

To feel wanted. To feel loved. To be known by our Creator. Isn't that what we all really want?

The Never-Ending Winter.

Long ago, when we were packing up for our move to Chicago, people told us, "There are two seasons in Chicago: Winter (which lasts about 6 months) and Summer." I wasn't sure I believed it. Now I do.

When I opened our heating bill yesterday, I was brutally reminded of what a cold and harsh winter this has been! We are back to the bone-chilling temperatures again, which we notice as soon as we pull back the covers in the morning and attempt to put our feet on the cold, drafty floor.

Our home is definitely not well insulated; freezing in the winter and super hot in the summer., our two main seasons. We very much cherish the few short weeks a year when we get in between temperatures! Even the boys are starting to bemoan the constant cold and icy snow. The other day we were walking home from school and Zakkai suddenly exclaimed, "Mommy, look! Grass!"

It has been so long since we've seen it that it was like seeing an oasis in the desert! Unfortunately, the grass will be covered up tomorrow in the next of our winter storms. I am much too seasoned to say it will be our last!

Zakkai is feeling much better from his illness. I think he has been battling a sinus infection and he hasn't been able to taste his food, which is a big disappointment for someone who enjoys his food so much! Hopefully it will pass soon. Thankfully, everyone else is fairly healthy, a little congestion aside.

There isn't too much else going on, besides just trying to figure out which direction our life is supposed to take. You know, minor things like that:) We are kind of at this stuck, cross-roads place. This really, really (really) long waiting place that has grown stale and we are trying to figure out what is best for our family right now. Ben just happened to pick up the boys' copy of "Oh The Places You'll Go!" by Dr. Suess last night and go figure, it really spoke to him about where we are and what life looks like sometimes. If you haven't read it, you should! Dr Suess clearly experienced a lot of things in his life if he was able to write a book like that. It's funny that even the words of a simple kid's book can sometimes touch you.

It would be really nice if there were a big flashing billboard telling us what will happen next or what to do. If you see one of those, let me know, okay?

We are trying to find some fun little things to do together as a family, to offset the serious life discussions:) It helped to have recent birthdays and we do have our upcoming anniversary to look forward to. We've been having fun with Zakkai's new Wii Mario Kart and having some fun races. Eliana has even taken some turns and loves being Baby Princess Peach! Sometimes at night, I'll say, "Goodnight, Baby Peach" and she said, "Good night, Mommy Princess!" She's a little joy, that one!

Here are a few cell phone pics over that past few weeks:

This is our new favorite cereal! It is too expensive to buy more than every once in awhile but wow! It is REALLY good!

I made bread bowls for the first time a month ago and was very impressed that they actually turned out:)

We had them with Broccoli Cheddar Soup. Next time I would make them smaller since they rose SO high and were impossible to finish!

Eliana wanted to match with Baby Anna for church a few weeks ago:)

Ben's mom sent a special Valentine's Day box for the kiddos and in it were these lips that make funny zipping whistling sounds. For the next few days, our home was filled with a joyful noise, even while doing homework!

Even Moosie got a pink one:)

A couple weeks ago on Saturday, we went to one of our favorite nearby libraries to stock up on books. They had ipads that the kids could take a turn on and we let them play for a little bit.

Eliana put a pair of earphones on but I'm almost certain they weren't even working! She likes to feel like she is big like her brothers:)

Last week when I did our grocery shopping for the rest of the month, it was so slushy and gross out that I couldn't bring the bags all the way in the house. I stopped on the towel that I keep by the door for boots/shoes and set the bags down, trip after trip. I noticed Eliana dragging a few bags away and when I was done, this is what I found! She is such a big helper for me:) The funny thing is, she kept telling me, as I was putting away the groceries, "Mama, You are such a good helper!"

Have a great Thursday!

Chocolate Cake and Germs!

 It will seem weird going to sleep before 11 pm tonight now that the Olympics are over. I admit that, although I will miss having something interesting on tv to watch, it will be nice not to wake up tired every morning!

On Friday, after I put Baby C down for his morning nap, Eliana and I made a chocolate cake for Zakkai's birthday! She was my very big helper, as she usually is when I bake and she was very excited that she would be tasting this cake, too! Later when I mixed up the icing, with Baby C hanging on my leg, I let E lick one of the beaters:)

Mmm! Baby C would've loved a lick of the frosting but I was pretty sure his mommy would say no to that one:) Maybe when he's bigger!

I am terrible at icing cakes. Definitely not my forte but I figure, as long as it tastes good, it's all good!

After a delicious dinner of pizza (which, I might add, is heartily improved by B's new pizza stone and a new sauce we whipped up!), we lit up the magical 7 candled cake and got ready to serenade our sweet guy.

Sweet face!

He said he didn't need a wish since he already had a birthday:) There was barely a peep our of all as they gobbled up the delicious Ghirardelli chocolate cake. Once I discovered how delicious everything is with that chocolate, I could not go back!

Saturday, we met our good friends at this really cool indoor playground and passed the morning getting the kiddos energy out. Always a favorite choice! Eliana was SOO tired from staying up late partying for Z the night before and going down slides that she fell sound asleep on the way home, despite all vehement protests that she wasn't tired:)

Yesterday morning, Zakkai woke up sick. I thought it was strange that he wasn't downstairs with Eliana and Samuel and found him curled up in bed reading. Very strange! Upon closer inspection, I found him flushed with fever and complaining of a headache:( We spent a quiet morning at home instead of going to church. Well, Zakkai was quiet anyways!

Samuel and Eliana practiced headstands! Almost Samuel...

A little higher!

Well, try again!

 Bingo!

Uh-oh, it's a copycat!

Trying her hardest!

Show off:)

Hard work, isn't it, Missy Girl?!

Practicing my camera shots on the Big Bird chair of Ben's childhood:) 30+ years old and still going strong....

See how perseverance pays off?! Well, with a little help anyways:)

We ended up playing a board game to pass some time, which was really nice. Zakkai perked up for a little while to play and then went back to hanging out on the couch reading. He was just congested and feverish, with swollen throat glands. Needless to say, since he still had a fever when we went to bed late, he stayed home from school today.

He was fever-free today and reclaimed much of his chattiness throughout the day! His throat is still pretty swollen and I am hoping that gets better as he sleeps. He had to walk with E and I to go get Samuel this afternoon and we ran into one of his classmates, who was home today with the exact same symptoms! We found out there were at least 3 of them out with the same virus. Hopefully it is short-lived and none of the rest of us share in his brotherly love.

We can only hope!

Happy Birthday, Z-man!

Our little Z-man isn't so little anymore! He is officially 7 years old now. Or 7 years and 6 hours old, he would like you to know:)

I usually relive my memories of each kiddos birth on their birthday but I have barely had the chance to think today and it's still so hard for me to wrap my mind around his age! He was the cutest little baby, with his full head of dark hair and his little triangle-shaped nostrils:) He was loud, too!

And....that hasn't changed!

Since he is getting a multi-day birthday celebration and this is is off-year for a party, I wanted to do a little something to make him feel special today. Ben and I decorated a birthday chair for him and blew up 7 balloons!

He came down to his "throne" and a special breakfast of mini chocolate chip pancake muffins, OJ and scrambled eggs! A good start:)

He is so darn cute! I think he looks so grown-up in this picture! He used to be SO chubby and he has gotten so lean, which is pretty amazing, quite frankly, considering how much he loves to eat! haha. Such a sweet boy.

After school, I had his presents from Grandma waiting by his throne and he was very excited to open them!

This is a classic Zakkai face right here, folks. This means he really likes something! He's a goofy kid, alright!

A few things about our Zany Zakkai:

*He loves his name! And it really suits him, too. Only one random person ever tried to shorten it to "Zak" on purpose and we quickly nipped that in the bud. But people most often glance at his name and call him "Zachary" or "Zakkaia" (with an "a" sound on the end).

*His favorite color is red. He decided that a long time ago when he realized Samuel's favorite color was also red. Samuel tried his darndest to get Z to change it to orange (which is Z's 2nd favorite color!) but red stuck:)

*He is crazy about reading! His top favorites are Magic Tree House, Diary of a Wimpy Kid and information books. We started reading to all of our kiddos at very young ages (2 months old) regularly and we have always encouraged it and make regular trips to the library. I think it's rubbing off!

*Zakkai is insanely and mysteriously good at figuring out how electronics work. He is naturally mechanically-minded and at Christmas time, he was the one who was able to help my grandparents figure out how some of their own electronics worked! He has a snap-circuit set we got him for Christmas last year and he just adores it. It fits him to a tee!

*Zakkai is a master at the coolest Lego inventions! Probably because of his engineering mind! I will have to take pictures sometime of his inventions. Maybe he will invent something for real someday...

*Z adores math! It just blossomed this year. We found out before Christmas that he was in the highest math class and we had no idea! He is in Math Club right now and it's too easy for him but he loves it:) He finished his first math book for the year last week and got a brand-new one yesterday. He talked about it for days, he was so excited. I was never excited about math so this is foreign to me!

*He loves to be tickle tortured by Daddy. He would not admit it to you and often cries wolf and screams like you wouldn't believe! But he always comes back for more and his giggle is heart-warming!

*Z is very bossy. Oh yes. He figured out the one person he can boss around is Little Sister and he takes full advantage of it! We call him our "policeman" and often have to crack down on him and get him to be gentler with his words and less "daddy-like" with her. He means well....

*His favorite foods are spaghetti and chocolate! He very very recently stopped calling it "pasketti" because Samuel kept correcting him. He loves the sauce most of all and lots of it! And every birthday without exception, he asks for a chocolate cake:) That's my boy!

*His least favorite foods are peanut butter (never tried it and refuses to!) and potatoes. Excepting french fries:) He didn't believe us for the longest time that french fries were made out of potatoes but we finally convinced him. All other forms of potatoes cause a serious look of disgust on his face and he can barely choke them down.

*Zakkai talks in his sleep and we can get him up to go to the bathroom and have conversations with him and he never remembers a thing in the morning! He even fell out of bed last week and called for me and tried really hard to tell me something and had no idea it happened.

Zakkai is smart and funny, vibrant and spunky, sweet and eager to please. We are so thankful for this person who brings so much life and joy to our home. He may give us some gray hairs sometimes but we wouldn't trade him in for anything in the world! He is a special one-of-a kind boy and we adore him!

Happy Birthday, Zakkai! We love you!